Today I’m not sure what will make me happy

Errrrrr. My opening statement. It’s nothing and everything today. I’m not sure how I feel about anything. Have you ever thought, ok well if I could make something different or had the means to do anything or go anywhere, what would I do, where would I go and what would I want?  And then you realize that there is not a damn thing that sounds appealing, fun, or would benefit you.  I mean not even a trip to an exotic land with the capability to sit and do nothing but absorb your surroundings.  Or a trip to Paris to drink wine and visit extravagant museums.  Well non of it sounds like it will bring me out of this funk.  Not even a few million dollars randomly dropping into my lap as I sit outside and wonder, what the hell.

I’m not depressed, I’m not mad, I’m not stressed, although I could be.  On a brief side note, I had a slow leak under my kitchen sink last month. It created a water mess.  We got it all cleaned up, or so I thought. My boyfriend has been feeling light headed and had a few weird symptoms…so long story short someone was telling us about the health issuesthat mold can bring about, if it’s present.  We had a mold inspection done and whatdoya know, we’ve got mold.  Mo’ mold mo’ problems…haha. Well we have this water damage company coming up out to today to clean out some mold.  So yousee, I could be stressed, but I’m not.

I just don’t feel like any one thing could lighten me up.  Call it hormonal, call it life, call it crazy, call it “need to tune into Vivian”, call it whatever, but I call it “money can’t buy my happiness” right now, I feel as if nothing can.

I used to get like this in my younger years.  I called it my bi-annual funk.  I haven’t had this funk for a long time. Nature usually can do it for me, pull me out of it.  Money never has been a help feature.  It really only gives me something to do that I don’t really care to do anyway.  Now I’m just rambling.  But that’s how I feel like a ramble without a clue what to do. I’m possibly embarrassed I’m even posting.  I am however posting because this is a time when It’s not about money, or not, not about money.  It’s a weird state that I am experiencing that has nothing to do with either. It’s neutral and is boring. Maybe I’m bored. Maybe the saying should be can money buy fun?  Well my answer is currently NO.  At least not until I snap out of this zone.

So anyone ever felt like this?  What are your thoughts on why? I’m sure I will contemplate it all tomorrow or even later when I’m in a more appealing, feeling state.  Now I will end my mini boring, rant post, and find something to do.  I need to make some kind of of cool appetizer for a friends house we are going to later (which at this time going does not sound like anything I want to do).  I saw this cool idea for parmesan cups. I thought they would be good with homemade mango guacamole inside.  Each person would get their own guac cup. So I found a recipe for the cups. Check it out Parm Cups. But remember I’m filling with guac instead.  At least I gave you a little value in reading this non-inspiring post, parm cups!!  You can also find the recipe on my extras page. Cheers to me, and cheers to you.